Yeah, its amazing how we can start out with the opposite of what we want.  When I was a teenager and trying really hard to be a girl, I was super self-conscious that all of my friends got breasts and I got nothing.  Well, I got darker, wider nipples.  That was it.  Even my sister got some growth, and although she didn't get much I was still jealous      But I guess it worked out in the end.  I was supposed to be a boy...even my body halfways knew it!  It was funny the other day, I was curled up with my husband and he was rubbing my chest and sides underneath my shirt.  He just randomly says, "You really are a boy, aren't you..."  Yep.  Nothin' there.  10 years ago I felt so horrible about it.  Now it makes me really happy.  I wouldn't mind if my body was scaled up to not be quite so short and tiny, but I mostly like how my body looks.  Never felt that way as a girl.      The fun thing about being androgynous is the ability to fit in just about any clothing that is relatively my size.  It makes passing easy because people just assume whatever they want, related to who I'm with at the time.  I easily look like boyfriend, girlfriend, little brother, weird sister, teenage kid...  I kind of like the flexibility and the ability to fade into the background. 

Elaborate 

Indeed! And this form of activism has the benefit of not triggering public resentment due to noise or disruption of services like protests and marches would do.  It also doesn't rely on organizing large groups of people for support.   What Marcy has done is intentionally put the government of Florida in a bad position.  If they don't act, it demonstrates that the authorities won't enforce the law.  If they do act, especially if they do it in a disproportionate  jackbooted-thug manner, it looks bad to the public, and there might even be public demand to remove the law.  The worse they treat her, the more bad press it will generate.  She might be aiming for this.   The wisest thing they could do (to retain their position) would be issue a mild fine for public nuisance, or to keep her in jail in her own private space for a couple of days, treating her very gently (with witnesses.) Token enforcement.  Fine line to walk, and I doubt the state is capable of doing that. 

Samantha, no need to apologise, your thread is entirely appropriate to the many MTF people who suffer dysphoria, and need remedies. I could write a book on alternative views and social concepts, but your title fits so many of us so well! Thank you!   Hugs,   Allie

Hi @Dexxter Valentine Graves. I've come out only to select family members. And only one is of my immediate family. We often find our own family, be they genetically related or not. Family is what you make of it. So if you feel safe to tell non-immediate family members, that's great. Let your heart guide you and be safe. It can feel scary to come out, but once you've done so, it can feel so freeing. And then it gets progressively easier. You'll learn whom you can trust. Good luck!

I'm sorry, maybe should have been things you do to feel yourself? I'm still getting my head around everything and by no means meant to offend anyone. Sorry again.

Hi & welcome @JellyPear. I relate a lot to what you shared. I am afab, ace & finally landed on nonbinary/transmasc. Your questions are all totally valid and well thought out. Indeed, it's not so easy to sort through internalized misogyny, all the gender norm signals from media, desire to be physically strong, and how asexuality is related to dissociation from aspects of the body that are often sexualized. You're the only one who can answer those questions for yourself, but there are many resources and supports to help you along the way such as gender therapy and the book Heather mentioned. Know we're here for you too! Keep questioning & try to focus on what does make you feel good - that'll point you in the right direction better than what makes you feel bad. And if you're able, learn about safe body building - perhaps developing your physique will delight you. Keep reading and writing here - many of us learn so much from each other.

I haven't worn men's clothing in a few years now.  I think there may be some jeans and t shirts up in the attic somewhere.  But that's cause I'm a hoarder, not cause I expect to wear them.  (There is a lot of stuff up there LOL and it's not all mine) I don't wear pants at all, although I have some capris in case I want them.  But that's just my personal preference.  I think it's because I had to wear pants for most of my life - and it's probably an overreaction. It was frightening at first, but now it's just my normal daily.  Dresses are so much more comfortable to me.

Thank you. All the support from here is what got me started. I've made appointments with medical centre and looking at face and body hair removal. Also going to start growing my hair. Thank you all so much for the support

They might want to make an example of her.  I assume this was ment to be a test case, so who knows how it will go. I do know I have no desire to go to jail - especially in Florida.  I have seen where they will cut your hair, and maybe give you "counseling." But yeah, she knew this going in, so…   I wish her good luck.

I completely agree with your viewpoint.  I believe we do reincarnate multiple times, and each of those experiences are absorbed into our True Essence.  We're not consciously aware of those other lifetimes, because "the rules" say we have to concentrate on our present life.  So we are covered with a temporary "veil of forgetfulness."    I am definitely the "old soul" type and always have been.  I'm sure I've been both male and female before-- I definitely have a certain female essence. To what degree our present tendencies are spiritual or physiological in nature I cannot tell.   This is how I picture my Higher Self in the disincarnate, divine realm.  (A.I. photo based on my actual physical features).

You have PM privileges now, Dexxter.  If you put your cursor over a member's name, a box will open and "message" will appear on the bottom left. Or you can go to a member's profile page and you'll see "message" near the top.   Carolyn Marie

I would probably have felt the need to be jealous about this years ago. I had a pretty average build for a guy but for the boobs. :D

I read the article. It doesn't sound like she's seeking pity, but doing exactly what she said she's not doing...being an activist. This is activism! She's very brave and, while the laws are beyond the pale of stupid, she should expect this treatment. I hope that if she does end up in jail that she doesn't suffer, but I image she will in some manner. Laws have to be tested, bad laws especially. But I won't hold my breath for Florida to do any soul searching because of this; I fully expect a jackbooted response.

Clothing has never really been a big deal for me.  I'm AFAB, and in my girl form it was mostly just jeans and t-shirts. In my boy form there isn't much difference.     Probably the best thing about my boy form is that it is much more acceptable to go shirtless in warm weather.  It also seems to make me pass better. Nobody assumes female gender when you aren't wearing a sure. At least, as long as your flat like me  So my warm weather look is basically just shorts and sandals. I would be most comfortable without the shorts, but Society is not that accepting yet

The first time dressing fully feminine was a disaster for me. Not because some bigot got in my face, luckily, it's because the night started with me going home, changing, and taking off all of my makeup and nail polish. Before that though, I was SUPER giddy and a little nervous. I wrote a big long post about it, but I've since had my thread taken down thanks to the current political climate. I learned on that day I couldn't go back, so at least I learned something from the experience. The next day I committed to a permanent femme presentation.   It was probably a bit anxiety inducing at the start, but my wardrobe is pretty conservative and small due to being unemployed and moving cross country so I've not been very bold. I'll probably feel super anxious again the first time I wear a dress out (damn my square shoulders!). I still haven't done that, don't even own one. Skirts? Check. High waisted skinny jeans? Yup. Body con tops? All the time. In fact I hate boxy, baggy clothes that I used live in.   These days, my dysphoria keeps me from going out dressed masc at all--I'm not a boy and I don't want to signal I am in any way. Like today, I am wearing a simple grey hoodie from a brewery but...I'm wearing leggings (I plan on hopping on the Peloton later) and my hair nicely combed with a headband and I HAD to conceal my dark circles, but plain otherwise. It's very normal now, I barely own any "masc typical" clothing. Those are t-shirts and you could question those as being masc at all, but they're sized bigger and I only use them as sleep shirts. My favorite t-shirts and the only ones worn out are the two my wife handed down to me, they are women's cut.

Pretty much. Civil Disobedience always comes with legal consequences until the law gets changed. Will acts of Civil Disobedience like this one cause the change she is seeking? No idea. Maybe it could help, maybe it could hurt. It does seem that she understood the risk.   It will be interesting to see what legal consequences she faces. 60 days in jail? If the government does that, it is pretty excessive for somebody washing her hands. Definitely could backfire on the state. They might just let her walk with a warning.   I definitely agree that such laws are a huge risk to anybody who's appearance deviates from expected gender norms.    

I'm intrigued and would ask but you said you didn't want to get into it here and so far I haven't found a way to like message anyone privatly

Very good for you!  

No worries!! We're here to help!!